Parenting with patience: what being an older mom teaches you about slowing down
Motherhood has a way of changing you. It reshapes your heart, your priorities, and—let’s be real—your sleep schedule. But when you become a mom later in life, something shifts in a way you might not expect. You slow down. You let go of the frantic need to do everything right and start focusing on what really matters.
For those who’ve had babies in their late 30s or 40s, patience isn’t just a virtue—it’s a survival skill. And honestly? It might just be the best gift we can give ourselves and our kids.
So let’s talk about how becoming a mom later in life changes your perspective, teaches you to embrace the slower moments, and why this new approach to parenting might be exactly what you (and your little one) need.
The Early Years: Rushing Through Life
If you spent your younger years watching friends have kids while you were focused on career, travel, or just figuring out who you are, you probably had moments of wondering, Am I missing out?
Now, here you are—finally holding your little miracle, and suddenly, you realize… this is exactly where I was meant to be.
There’s something about entering motherhood a little later that makes you appreciate it in a whole new way. Maybe it’s because you had more time to understand yourself. Maybe it’s because you’ve learned that rushing through life doesn’t actually get you anywhere faster. Or maybe it’s because, at this stage, you know just how quickly time passes—and you’re not about to let it slip away.
Photo by Erin Wilwert Photography
Why Patience Comes More Naturally Later in Life
Patience isn’t something we’re all born with. It’s something we learn, often the hard way. And motherhood is the ultimate crash course in patience.
But when you have kids later, you might find yourself handling the chaos with a little more grace than you expected. Here’s why:
1. You’ve Had More Time to Develop Emotional Resilience
In your 20s, a toddler tantrum in the middle of Target might have sent you into a spiral of stress and embarrassment. Now? You just nod at the other moms giving you the I’ve been there look, take a deep breath, and wait it out.
With age comes the ability to handle tough moments with a little more perspective. You know this meltdown isn’t forever. You know your child isn’t actually trying to ruin your day. And you know that patience in these moments will serve both of you better than frustration ever could.
2. You Know How Fast Time Flies
When you have kids later in life, you have the advantage of hindsight. You’ve watched your friends’ babies grow into teenagers. You’ve seen how quickly the newborn phase fades into toddlerhood, then preschool, then poof—they’re packing for college.
That perspective changes everything.
Instead of wishing away the sleepless nights, you remind yourself, this won’t last forever. Instead of stressing over milestones, you learn to enjoy where your baby is right now. Instead of rushing through bedtime, you take the extra few minutes to soak in their little voice, their tiny hands, the way they fit perfectly in your arms.
Because you know—one day, you’ll miss this.
3. You’ve Learned to Let Go of Perfection
When we’re younger, we put so much pressure on ourselves to do things right. The perfect sleep schedule. The ideal feeding routine. The Pinterest-worthy birthday party.
But by the time you reach your late 30s or 40s, you’ve learned an important truth: Perfect parenting doesn’t exist.
Your baby doesn’t care if the nursery is Instagram-worthy. Your toddler won’t remember if dinner was organic or if they ate mac and cheese three nights in a row. What they will remember is how you made them feel—safe, loved, and cherished.
So you let go of the pressure. You embrace the mess. And you give yourself permission to enjoy motherhood without the unrealistic expectations.
How to Slow Down and Enjoy Motherhood More
Slowing down doesn’t mean doing less as a mom. It just means being more present. Here’s how you can start embracing a more patient, mindful approach to parenting:
1. Stop Watching the Clock
It’s easy to get caught up in schedules—nap times, meal times, errands, chores. But some of the most magical parenting moments happen when you forget the schedule for a bit.
Let your child lead sometimes. Watch where their curiosity takes them. Sit on the floor and build a block tower without checking your phone. Take the long way home just to enjoy the drive.
Motherhood isn’t a checklist. It’s a collection of moments.
2. Create Rituals, Not Routines
Instead of focusing on what you need to do each day, focus on how you do it.
Turn bedtime into a special snuggle-and-story time, instead of just another thing to check off the list.
Make mealtime about connection—letting your child help stir, set the table, or tell you about their day.
Start little traditions, like Sunday morning pancakes or after-school walks, that give your child something to look forward to.
These small, meaningful rituals will become the memories they cherish most.
3. Take More Photos—But Be in Them Too
One of the biggest regrets parents have is not capturing enough of the early years. But here’s the thing—you need to be in the photos, too.
So often, moms are behind the camera, snapping pictures of their kids but avoiding being in them. But one day, your children will want to see you—the way you held them, the way you looked at them, the way you loved them.
This is why I do what I do. As a newborn and family photographer in Charlotte, NC, I help moms freeze these fleeting moments in beautiful, timeless portraits. Because trust me—you’ll never regret having too many photos of this season of life.
If you’re ready to capture these sweet, slow moments before they slip away, let’s chat. Book your newborn or milestone session with Erin Wilwert Photography today!
Photo by Erin Wilwert Photography
You’re Exactly Where You Need to Be
Motherhood later in life comes with its own unique joys and challenges, but one of the biggest gifts is the ability to slow down and savor it all.
So take a deep breath. Let go of the rush. Be present in the chaos, the cuddles, the laughter. Because one day, you’ll look back and realize—these were the good old days.
And mama, you’re doing just fine.
